Obituary of Jason McCaffrey

Obituary The youngest of five children was born to Eunice and Leo McCaffrey on June 24, 1971 at 6:30 pm, Fort St. John, BC. He died on May 3, 2003 in Vancouver, BC. Mourning the loss of Jason are his parents Leo & Eunice; his siblings and their spouses Gregory & Iris, of Vernon, BC; Sean & Rhonda, of Grande Prairie, AB; Catherine & Russell Wagg, of Campbell River, BC; Maureen McCaffrey-Pontin & Bob Pontin, of Carrying Place, ON; nephews Aaron Edzerza, Connor McCaffrey, Coleman McCaffrey & David McCaffrey; nieces Elizabeth McCaffrey & Hannah McCaffrey; godsons Benjamin Wagg and Jonathon Wagg; and his many aunts, uncles and cousins from the McCaffrey, Birley and Beaton families. Jason is predeceased by both sets of grandparents; Wilfrid & Aurelie McCaffrey, of Edam, SK and John & Mabel Beaton, of Fort St. John, BC. On Tuesday, May 6, 2003, Jason's immediate family and friends gathered for a viewing and service in Vancouver, BC. Father Tom Shymko officiated at the funeral mass and burial on Saturday, May 10, 2003 from the Church of the Resurrection in Fort St. John, BC. Active pall bearers were Davide Loro, of Fort St. John and Mark Hauk, of Williams Lake. Honorary pall bearers were Ben Faulkner, Corey Dixon, Adam Boyd & Ken Manley, of Vancouver, BC; and Jamie Gardner & David Kowalski, of Fort St. John, BC. Karl Anderson of Prince George played the special music - the piano prelude and recessional, and accompanied the Church Choir. Reading during Mass were by Jason's good friends Tomm Jensen, Dan Willson and family friend Wilf Rector. Eulogy was by Doug Boyd, his friend and former school principal. Expression of sympathy to the Hospital Foundation and to Father Ken Forster's African Mission Fund. Following the interment of ashes in Woodlawn cemetery, a reception tea was held at the North Peace Cultural Centre. Jason's short life was filled with many interests and pursuits. His keen enthusiasm in all walks of life led him to many interesting avenues in employments and travel. He loved swimming and most water sports, gymnastics, hiking, camping and rock climbing. Jason was talented in sketching and oil painting. He loved studying and discussing the Holy Bible. He travelled extensively through Malaysia and Thailand, and to Australia, the Caribbean and United States. Varied employment over the years from lifeguard and swim instructor, retail and sales, paving and a welding apprenticeship led to his decision that welding was to be his career. Jason returned to Vancouver to complete his welding ticket with the goal of becoming an underwater welder. Jason's smile, contagious laughter, twinkling blue eyes and caring demeanour, and especially his loving attitude toward those in need are dearly missed. Rest in the Lord. Remembering Jason: A Eulogy by Doug Boyd Each one of us is here today in recognition of the many cherished moments that we have spent with a true friend. For the longest time, as a parent, I always mention or introduced Jason as "Adam's friend". It wasn't until this past week that I realized he was much more than that. He was my friend too. In fact if I could be so bold as to say he was not only a true family friend but played a role in our household similar to that of an extended family member. Knowing Jason's charm and ability to make friends so easily, I am sure that many of the families sitting here today could say that they too had the opportunity to share this sense of belonging. Eunice and Leo, I would like to thank you for instilling in Jason an incredible ability to see the good in people, to be respectful of the feelings of others and value their opinions. Additionally, your willingness to give him the freedom to 'adopt' many of us was greatly appreciated. However, for many years, I was not sure whether you were blessing us with his companionship or if it was really a means to share the food bill. I say this because I know that like many teenagers Jason went through the hollow leg syndrome. Typically, for some reason, we always had dinner late on Friday nights. It didn't take Jason long to figure that with the right timing he could go home, have a family meal and then show up at our place just as the food arrived or was ready to be served. I have to say that this habit or pattern of behaviour never changed. In fact, the last time he was out at our house - you guessed, it was a Friday night - as the Chinese food arrived he was overheard saying "just another Friday at the Boyd house". Over the past few days I am sure that all of us have shared memories with others that have brought both tears and laughter. Through discussion, the often forgotten, special moments are brought to the forefront of our minds and now even more bring a smile to our face. Eunice reminded me the other day of a time when Jason was somehow blowing up his fish tank and phoned me to come to the rescue before his parents flooring was completely ruined. Eunice, I must tell you that your words of reflection brought a smile to my face that eased the pain I was feeling at that moment. With the family's permission I have sought input from many people. When asked to describe Jason's most outstanding characteristic, without exception people indicated "his smile". In fact, his laughter was contagious. One of his elementary teachers, Mr. Bartlett, stated to me that Jason stood out in a class of geniuses. Unfortunately Hugh could not be here today but did send an e-mail that relayed some of his thoughts that I would like to share. He wasn't afraid to speak up, and always seemed to be able to think like a little adult. Jason wasn't beyond a little mischief; he had that McCaffrey twinkly in his eye that often gave away a practical joke of some sort, but always in good fun rather than of a malicious manner. I don't ever remember him getting in any real trouble. In later years whenever I saw Jason, he always had time to chat, and we would catch each other up on our families; not idle chatter, but genuine interest., He was one of those students who was easily recognizable as he aged, because his smile never changed, it was a grin from ear to ear. When we lose someone at such a young age, it saddens us, and the news hit me really hard. The only solace I have is that I was lucky enough to know him for the amount of time I did, and I am the richer for it. This next part is going to be very difficult to read, as I know the thought and emotion that went into writing it. It is even more difficult because it comes from our son Adam. One of the first times I saw Jason was at a high school talent show at Dr. Kearney where he was part of a break-dancing troupe. I remember thinking to myself, "that is the coolest little kid I have ever seen". In a desperate attempt to gain his friendship, I pretended to be really interested in break-dancing just so that we would have something in common. As it turned out, the break-dancing thing was just a fad, but our friendship persisted. For years, we did everything together. Rarely was one of us seen in public without the other. We spent countless hours performing in our own poor excuses for Kung-Fu movies. Watching re-runs of SCTV. Trying to figure out how Kevin Bacon did his hear. Painting huge and fantastic murals. Trying to learn to skateboard in gravel driveways. Arguing about the superiority of saltwater fish over freshwater fish. Cruising around in his huge boat of a bar, debating theology and vegetarianism... I could go on and on, but the point is that I will cherish those 20 years that I knew Jason like I will cherish no other part of my life. I loved him like a brother. Jason had the easiest and most genuine laugh of anyone I have ever known. I 've been thinking over the last few days about how much I will miss that laugh - how much all of us will miss that laugh. Although today a terribly sad day, just remembering that laugh of his is enough to ease some of that sadness - and it will always make me smile. To illustrate his sensitivity and compassion - our daughter Courtney, during a recent phone conversation, expressed how impressed she was by Jason's consideration for others. One recent Christmas Jason found out that she was home and showed up to rescue her from another evening alone with her parents. Many individuals spoke of Jason as a very talented individual. Not only in the area of 'people skills' but also as an athlete in such pursuits as gymnastics, the martial arts and yes even acting. Jason always wanted to share his newfound toys with his family - like the time when he bought a motorcycle. Apparently after his mom reassured him that she was not afraid to go for a ride, he showed up at her work one day with an extra helmet in hand. Now, I can't tell the story like Eunice but it went something like this. Not wanting to disappoint him or show her reluctance she boarded this red beast of a machine. Now here is the picture. Eunice, who is a very refined lady and always want to be color-coordinated with her clothing, is sitting on a red machine, wearing extremely wide-legged purple 'palazzo' pants with a helmet that doesn't match, being told by her son to just hang on and everything will be fine. By the first stop sign, Jason had to stop and say "Mom I told you to hand on - but have to let me breathe." Well after streaking through the streets of Fort St. John with pants just 'a flapping' they finally arrived safely home. Although her pants had shifted so high that they now appeared to be shorts, Eunice kept her composure and told Jason she liked it so much that she would have to steal his red leathers and do it again. When Jason was about 13 he really got into the Ninja scene to the point that Ken Manly actually thought he was a Ninja. Apparently at night Jason would sneak out to save the world, dressed in Ninja garb complete with real sword. Again having no fear, he would ride his bike across town and show up at our place, mask intact. Jason loved to debate, although Sean referred to it as 'he loved to argue'. A case in point was when he was arguing with his dad about the existence of swamp snakes. Now this was before he was of school age and could read yet but to prove his point, he went and got an encyclopedia and pointed to a picture of a snake with the caption 'Swamp Snake'. Thus the debate, he would say "but mother, you are not being logical". All of our lives have been enriched by the time we were given to spend and share with Jason. It is a sad time indeed that we have to say farewell. We must now take solace in the knowledge that through his upbringing he developed the skills to encourage each and every one of us to be open, honest and true friends. "A friend? What is a friend? One with whom you dare to be yourself. You do not have to be on your guard. You can say what you think, so long as it is genuinely you. He understands those contradictions in your nature that lead others to misjudge you. With him you breathe freely". Let us recognize Jason today as a common thread, our friend, who continues to intertwine our lives. Greg, Cathe, Sean and Maureen (Moe), thank you along with your parents for providing us the opportunity to openly share with your grief. Your brother and son was truly a remarkable individual who, in his very short years, touched the lives of so many people. Our hearts and thoughts go out to your and your family. I ask each of you to take a moment to think of a special interaction you had with Jason. As you place yourself back to that moment in time, focus on the smile that starts to form on your face and sense the pleasant feeling that accompanies it. This is Jason's gift to you, treasure it and never let it go. Cemetery Details Woodlawn Cemetery Fort St. John, BC, Services You can still show your support by sending flowers directly to the family, or by planting a memorial tree in the memory of Jason McCaffrey