Obituary of Paula Jean Vadney
DURHAM-
Paula Jean Vadney, a powerhouse of spirit and individuality, passed away on September 2, 2022. She endured a brief but brutal illness, embracing her fate with dignity, acceptance, and unimaginable courage. She showed no anger, no remorse and never claimed to be a victim. She stared death in the face and kissed it on the cheek.
In life, she showed a fierce commitment to going her own way. Even as a young child, when she'd had enough, she was known to pack a suitcase, wander off into the woods, sit in a clearing under a tree and not return home until SHE was ready.
She had no use for dolls, other than to use their clothes as costumes for the stray cats she snuck into the house. A chipmunk, squirrel or chicken could be crouched and waiting behind any cabinet door - all boarders under Paula's fostering care. The odd lump under her bed cover was likely a piglet from the pen.
She could be seen galloping through Greene County - bareback and wearing a bikini - riding Sugarbabe, the most beloved of her childhood horses. Later in life, she often apologized to Sugarbabe for having ridden him so hard.
As a teenager, she could run a 440-yard dash in under a minute in the morning, and then win a dance competition in the Catskills later that night.
Her stunning physical beauty prompted many photographers and clothing line reps to attempt recruiting her as a model. She did some fashion modeling in NYC and elsewhere, but ultimately decided that career path would be false, superficial, and probably lead to ruin.
She had many close, dear, lifelong friends. As a young woman, she ran with a core group who called themselves the Racoons. In Danskins and tight skirts, they strutted and clicked their heels across the Capital District, raising hell and crushing the boastful pride of many young men into dust.
She had an uncanny (and annoying) ability to make almost any bank shot in pool without ever laboring over an angle. She just leaned down, drew back the cue, bounced a rail and sank the shot. At a bar, her charm and good looks got her on the table. Her skill kept her there, filling her purse with money. And if trouble broke out, she did not hesitate to swing that pool cue in defense of a loved one.
But beneath a sometimes-brash exterior lay a deep and powerful spiritual pool that Paula drew from. She felt a strong connection with the creation source in all things. She would often lay her hand on an old tree and weep with joy at the energy she felt, seemingly sensing its life journey all the way to the Big Bang that formed its atoms, and to the loving source that set this world in motion.
Her perceptions and intuitions were not restricted to the physical world. In sleep, she often had detailed and instructive conversations with family and friends who had passed, waking with a smile and a hankering for pancakes.
She sometimes sensed ethereal forces nearby and would either gently guide friends and family away from harm or quietly smile in comfort knowing that a positive spirit was in her presence.
She shared her metaphysical gifts with the people close to her, those who were willing to accept them. Thankfully, two of her nieces will carry this part of Paula forward.
Her bond with family was unbreakable
She fondly remembered cooking beside her mother Anita in the Belvedere, the family restaurant, hustling out more than 100 dinners a night, the two of them chopping as one, barking orders and whispering recipes. Whenever she smelled garlic on her fingers, she felt the comfort of her mother. And in her final hours, she quietly called out to Anita many times.
A sweet softness came over her face every time she conjured up her father Harold. Remembering riding shotgun in his milk delivery truck, being curled up behind the bend of his knee on a couch or sharing secrets they swore to, was to regain the closeness she cherished. The unique relationship she had with her father was one of her prized possessions.
She adored her brother Richie, who passed away far too young. He took Paula everywhere, including for romps through the creeks of Hannacroix, teaching her how to catch frogs, how to live in the moment, savor the sweetness of life, and how to find the good in people.
Her brother Harold, whose enduring kindness and love light perhaps shone brightest in the final weeks and days as he sat beside Paula for hours, stroking her hair, offering his chicken soup, and providing spiritual comfort.
With her sister Ann Marie, she shared the kind of bond that sisters among four brothers can only forge. At times the two were inseparable. They were there for each other throughout, and their bond grew stronger over time.
She cherished her brother John, her lifelong confidant, who was always there for her, especially in times of trouble. He was a constant, trusted source of support, solace, and unconditional love, and Paula relied on his good humor to get her through the toughest times.
Her brother Joe was her great protector. When she slipped her hand into his big mitts, she felt the safety of a big brother who would do anything for, lay down his life for her if necessary. She knew Joe had her back, no matter what.
Paul Kentoffio, her love of many years, did everything in his power to bring joy to her life. At their lakeside home at the foot of the Catskills, they melted into the warm embrace of nature, counting scarlet tanagers, and growing perfect tomatoes. They will continue looking at stars in a cloudless sky, adding campfire wood to their eternal flame.
All who knew Paula understood that she was a free spirit, a true original. If you met Paula, you would remember Paula. She is indelible. And the hard-shell Paula could sometimes show protected an endearing sweetness just below the surface that radiated love in all directions. If that love touched you, it would remain with you forever. For that, many are thankful.
Paula was preceded in death by her father Harold Vadney and brother Richard Vadney.
Paula is survived by her mother Anita Vadney, her brother Harold Vadney, her sister Ann Marie Vadney, her brother Joseph Vadney (Debbie McGuire) and his daughter Destiny (Anthony) Califano; her brother John Vadney, his wife Dawn Vadney and their two children, Joshua and Victoria Vadney; her sister in-law Mary Vadney, and her two children, Gina Vadney and Jessica Vadney; and brother in-law, Edward Hayes.
She is also survived by Bello, the mini - Aussie Shepard she rescued from the want ad digest, the envy of every dog who longs to run free, play hard and chase wild things through the woods.
Relatives and Friends are invited to call from 4-7pm on Friday, September 9th, at the Riverview Funeral Home, 218 2nd Avenue, (corner of 104th Street) in Troy. The Funeral Service Liturgy will begin at 10am, on Saturday, September 10th, in the Riverview Funeral Home with burial to follow in the Stanton Hill Cemetery in Hannacroix, NY.
In lieu of flowers, please consider offering a donation to Catholic Charities of Columbia and Greene Counties, catholiccharitiescg.org.
To leave a special message for the Vadney & Kentoffio Families, please visit: TheRiverviewFuneralHome.com
Visitation
4:00 pm - 7:00 pm Friday, September 9, 2022
Riverview Funeral Home
218 2nd Avenue
Troy, New York, United States
12180
Funeral Service Liturgy
10:00 am - 11:00 am Saturday, September 10, 2022
Riverview Funeral Home
218 2nd Avenue
Troy, New York, United States
12180
Interment
12:30 pm - 1:00 pm Saturday, September 10, 2022
Stanton Hill Cemetery
County Route 51
NEW BALTIMORE, New York, United States
12087
Donations, in lieu of flowers
In lieu of flowers, please consider offering a donation to: Catholic Charities of Columbia and Greene Counties WEBSITE: catholiccharitiescg.org